Photo by Anuj Yadav on Unsplash
What if God asks you to surrender the very thing He has placed in your heart?
That question has been sitting heavy with me lately and something I have been praying about. And honestly, it is a prayer that I have been hesitant to pray…."Let it grow, Lord — or let it go." And yet, the hardest part is facing the possibility that the answer might be to let it go."
Maybe you know that feeling. Maybe there is something you have been holding onto — a dream, a relationship, a ministry, a calling — and you are not sure if you are still supposed to be carrying it. If so, I want to share where I have been, because I believe you might find yourself somewhere in this story.
Consider Abraham. God asked him to sacrifice the very promise He had given him — his son, his miracle.
Isaac was not just a child; he was the fulfillment of everything God had spoken over Abraham's life. I cannot imagine what must have gone through Abraham's mind as he climbed that mountain. Yet he went anyway. He trusted. He obeyed — not because he understood, but because he knew the character of the God who had made the promise. And in his obedience, God revealed His provision in a way Abraham never could have anticipated.
"Do not lay a hand on the boy. Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son." — Genesis 22:12 (NIV)
I find myself in a somewhat similar place.
As some of you know, I started my photography business officially in 2023, though the path began earlier at the end of 2021. I firmly believe God planted this in my heart during that season, and it was confirmed by someone near and dear to me — someone I deeply trust for their Godly wisdom and insight.
But it has been far more challenging than I ever anticipated.
As I enter my 4th year of this business, I have not had the growth in clients or revenue I hoped for. I have found myself stuck between two markets — one very competitive, filled with many talented, established photographers, and another more rural, where the need for my photography style simply isn't there. I’ve had the privilege of working with some truly amazing clients, but the consistency hasn’t been what I'd hoped for.
The real exhaustion came from the endless cycle of trying to figure out why my business isn’t growing and how to fix it. I have spent hours analyzing, strategizing, and second-guessing myself. That has worn me down. In addition — I have allowed comparison to steal my peace. Seeing others who have been doing this far less time accomplish what I have yet to only adds to that. I know comparison is a thief and I let it in anyway.
This exhaustion eventually led me to a harder question: God, is this truly what I’m called to do—and if so, is now even the right time?
The longer I sat with that question, the more I began to see something I had not wanted to admit. This dream had quietly crowded out my pursuit of God. Years ago, in one of my very first blog posts, I shared that God had placed it on my heart to write. And yet I have spent hours on YouTube watching photography videos, on social media, in photography classes — while that calling sat waiting.
Maybe you have been there too. Has a dream, even one God gave you, become a distraction from the very One who gave it? Could it be that without even realizing it, that dream has become an idol?
I had to ask myself a hard question — is a photograph more important than sharing God's Word and encouraging one another? That is where I found myself. And that is what brought me to the prayer I had been avoiding.
I had to ask myself a hard question — is a photograph more important than sharing God's Word and encouraging one another? That is where I found myself. And that is what brought me to the prayer I had been avoiding.
"Let it grow, Lord — or let it go."And He is answering.
I have poured time, money, and a piece of my heart into this over the past few years — and releasing that is not easy. Especially when letting go feels uncomfortably close to failure. But sometimes God asks us to lay down the very thing He once promised us. Not to punish us but to test our faith, our obedience, and our trust — and to reveal His provision in ways we never could have imagined on our own.
I want to be clear about something. I am not surrendering this in hopes that God will reward my obedience with a flood of new clients. That is not the posture of my heart. I am letting go because I simply want more of Him — more time in prayer, more time in His Word. The weight I have been carrying is not only the weight of a struggling business. It is the weight of misplaced priorities, and I feel it.
Maybe for you it is not a photography business. Maybe it is a relationship you have been trying to hold together. A ministry that feels like it is going nowhere. A dream you have carried so long it has started to feel more like a burden. Whatever it is — I want you to hear this:
Letting go in surrender is not the same as giving up in defeat.
When we open our hands in full obedience, we make room to receive something far greater than what we are holding onto. The climb up that mountain may be filled with questions and tears. But like Abraham, we can trust that God sees what we cannot. He is not asking us to give up our dreams to leave us empty. He is asking us to give them back to Him so He can do something only He can do.
So here I stand — hands open, heart surrendered.
"Let it grow, Lord — or let it go."
Either way, I trust You.
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